Couples Therapy

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you built against it” ~Rumi

Finding a partner to share your life with can be one of our most joyous experiences.

Relationships provide us with an opportunity to learn about love. How to give and how to receive. We are drawn to people who fit our early attachments and  old familiar experiences of love. The lyrics of the song “I want a girl just like the girl who married dear ole dad” becomes more a prophecy than not. This is not a bad thing. It is inevitable. It provides another chance to get it right.

Just like everything else in life, our relationships change as we change personally and as we face difficult events that life hands us. How to navigate through changes is a major challenge to any relationship. The more secure we are in a relationship, the more we are able to allow our partners to grow and to become who they truly are.  When we  become insecure we  either protest or withdraw . Our tendency is to try to change our partner, and this never works.

Couples therapy can help you to identify the patterns in your relationship and find new ways to communicate and interact.The process is most effective when both partners are committed to the process and each is willing to look at their own role in the dysfunctional pattern.

“We cannot make another person change his or her steps to an old dance, but if we can change our own steps, the dance no longer can continue in the same predictable pattern” ~Harriet Lerner